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Archive for February 6th, 2012

by photoop23 at webshots

I kind of suck at dating and men. Yeah, I know I am still married (sort of) and I’m told that we are still working on it, but what if this doesn’t work? I have always had problems with men. I seem to be the woman who gets dumped on and here we are again with the same problem after 22 years of marriage. I have always wanted to be loved and to show the person I love how much I care-I am a very compassionate person. So, when my husband became distant, I tried to reach out to him even more which caused him to feel “pressured.” I don’t know if we can get through this. My stance is that if you love someone with all of your heart you want the best for them and you want to give them the best. Simple, right? To me, it is really easy. Selfless love is what a true loving relationship is all about. We deny our selfish desires so that we might provide comfort or whatever is needed for the one that we love. Problems happen when someone thinks they are giving too much and not receiving enough. One of the biggest issues in this part of the relationship is when we seek self-gratification and instantly. Society has really hurt in this respect.

Things and relationships can be repaired but both individuals must be willing to work at it and see that neither is supreme and the only way love can live is for both to give-selflessly. Guys-MEN, you need to treat the woman of your life as the best gift and let her know she is number one. Tell her how special she is no matter what. Women should also treat the guy-the man-like this never letting him doubt himself. Of course it is not always going to work out peachy perfect-one has to be responsible for him/herself, but if both individuals work at loving each other there is something to work toward.

I have made sacrifices all of my life in one way or the other. I have tried to put myself last in everything that I could. Now, when I need my mate, my girls are leaving the nest, so too is my mate. I have been looking forward to their leaving all of my married life so that we could have each other not worrying about the hectics of daily life–sort of like an extended honeymoon. If this is not the saddest part of my life I don’t know what is. Please be good to each other. Learn to care and be compassionate. Try to always see the best in your mate. Different perspectives and expectations can kill a marriage. So can not willing to give more than you should. Live well!

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