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Archive for February 25th, 2012

While going through some of my mom’s stuff after she passed away, I found a letter she had written to my father before they were married in 1952. It is a very beautiful love letter and one I wish I had known about before my dad died. It is special and something I will cherish always. I keep it and their wedding invitation in my father’s “jewelry” box.

My Wedding Rings

It took me a while to realize that they didn’t appear to be engaged at the time of the letter but were very serious. Yeah, they were serious! They were married 5 months later. True love! My mom was a true romantic and my dad loved my mom. When he passed away, my mother was brokenhearted. I wasn’t there for her like I should have been. In later years, we became closer and I moved back to take care of her. I hope she knew how much I loved her.

When I met my husband to be, it was crazy. We liked each other (it was more like we loved each other) and began to date but broke up at my insistence. We had both just gotten out of marriages that were not good or had gone wrong and I didn’t want the same thing to happen again. I was dealing with a lot of things at the time (haven’t I always??) and I just wanted to have fun for a while. I enjoyed the chase and being the subject of his affection but I wanted my next marriage to last. In the time we were apart, I tried not to pine for him but I knew there was something missing. He made me complete and I completed him. I actually fell in love with him without my knowing. I even pretended that I did not like him. I’m serious! About 1-2 months passed. I had been thinking of calling him and just could not bring myself to reopen that bag of worms. Then, out of the blue he called me and we got together to hang out. Within 5 months we were married. There was no real engagement. We knew we wanted to marry each other and we did. I wonder if my mom felt the same about my dad.

The 3-heart shaped amethysts and diamond ring was my wedding ring. Later, my husband gave me a wedding band in which he had inscribed, "I'll love you forever and ever." Please overlook my worn hands.

I never knew how much our early dating time parodied my parents, but those differences stopped there. My mom’s mother was against her marriage to my father to some degree and held it against her for the rest of her life and even after she passed away. Life is funny in ways we don’t understand. My mom liked my husband-to-be and gave her blessing-more so than my first time around.

We live, we make mistakes, we learn, and we go on, but hopefully, there is a lot of love in between! Take care and may your gardens be blessed with beautiful bounty and plenty of love!

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Well, I might have a problem. My hubby is now waffling on taking me dancing and tells me that we might go one day… I wanted to go this week because we didn’t go last week and now he tells me, “You know I’m not big on dancing.” Ok. This was not up for discussion. I usually am up to compromise but not this time. I’m not being selfish. I want this for US! IT IS IMPORTANT!!!!!

Guys/Gals, when you love someone, do what your love wants to do, at least a lot of the time. If it is walking on the moon, do everything you can to make that wish come true not because you want to do it but because you love her/him and she/he wants to do it. My husband used to be like that but has changed.

I just got through watching and listening to some of Rev. Neil Rhodes sermons. There is a series he has done on marriage, shame, etc. The last one I watched was entitled, “I want a new marriage.” In it, he talks about what really breaks up marriages. He had everyone write the 5 things down that he believed was the cause…. Selfishness was number one. Number two was Selfishness…. Number three was….Selfishness. “Are you writing these down?” Number four was Selfishness. And, lastly, number five was-bet you cannot guessSelfishness. Yep. Selfishness and not willing to compromise on anything are two biggies in my book. It takes two to make a go of it and keep it going. Be good to your spouse!

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